Those days when you are completely exhausted.... ya, it's one of those days. I finished a shift at work and I need to go to the gym, yet like always I have homework... which really means I'm on social media sites. I woke up today and I missed 3 classes... I know I shouldn't but I needed sleep. Besides that I got things done today. I organized my clothing, went through random stuff I have and read more in my book. I'm back to being confused on my feelings, on multiple levels. Why is it that every time I think that things are working out I get myself backfired on?

Do you get through those times in life when you on confused on what you want? I feel as if I have a goal.. but yet it's too vague. I don't know what I want and that upsets me. I feel as if I should have my life together, especially my romantic life. I guess I just need to go with what I always tell people "don't go out looking, it happens when it happens." I tell people that all the time, and I like to think I believe that. Yet somehow I don't for some reason. Maybe it's because I want things to work out and I am looking? With each day passing it comes closer to seeing you again, yet closer to leaving you... I want to tell you what is happening. I guess I'm too afraid to go through all of the heart aches and awkwardness of it. I keep telling people one thing, I guess it's because thats what I want it to be like... I'm not sure if you believe it. I want to confront you but I don't have the courage yet. But with each day I think it's getting better. There are times when you are so obnoxious and I don't see how anyone can stand you yet there are other moments when I see you as more than that. I guess I'm wishing for something that won't come true.

"If they don't love you at your worst, than they don't deserve you at your best." I just need to stick to what I want… it's just... hard.